02.29.08
Posted in Writing, Photography, Sea of Dreams, Second Chances at 3:22 pm by Bryan
Yeah, I know. I tease you into thinking that I’m going to start keeping up with the blog and then I disappear again. Well, I’m back, and I’ll try to do better.
I’ve been working quite a bit at getting the photography business up and running, as well as writing when I need a change of pace. I just started up a new site for online photo sales. Getting that started was a huge hassle since it was done under severe time pressures. I had to have things ready by this weekend. I just made it. I’m doing the photo upload even as I write to you now (and will be for another two hours).
It is not ready for “public” sales yet, just existing clients, but it will be soon. You can find it at http://bjwcreations.lifepics.com/ though at the moment you need an event code to access any photos. The nice thing about this site is that I can sort the images by client, giving each client access to only their photos, and I can accept orders and payments, the images are automatically transfered to my photo lab when the order is submitted, confirmation e-mails are automatically sent to my client when the order is placed, printed, and shipped (though at the moment I don’t have the shipping option ready). Eventually, if I wanted to, I could do a photographic road trip and be able to get images to clients around the country with very little hassle.
Other than the photography, I’ve been doing some writing… though not on “Sea of Dreams”. I’ve been working on “Second Chances” instead. I’m not sure why, other than it seems to be the one that is coming through easier. I actually have a complete story outline now and am working on replacing notes like “stuff happens here” with actual stuff. With “Sea of Dreams” I’m still not sure about where things are going… especially with Gabby. My main problem is that Gabby doesn’t really have much of an arc other than her adjustment to living without Steve. She’s fairly well put together and her adjustment is remarkably easy, which helps her deal with Ian’s issues but makes you wonder about how real she really is.
So, until I figure out how to screw her up without ruining her, I’ve put it on the back burner.
There you have it.
There it is.
I’ll try not to make you wait so long until the next update.
One hour twenty-nine minutes left. I guess I’ll go read the news.
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09.15.06
Posted in Writing, Sea of Dreams, Second Chances at 8:00 am by Bryan
I’ve joined a small critique group.
This is going to be very helpful, yet there is a possible problem, too. You see, my most active manuscript is Second Chances, but it’s not yet ready for public consumption. Even the private helpful kind like a critique group would provide. This means that I will most likely post scenes from Sea of Dreams, which is further along. Which also means that once the critique has caught up to my progress, I’ll need to start paying more attention to Sea of Dreams than I do now. Which in turn means that I will have less time for Second Chances.
But the good news is something will always be getting worked on.
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08.12.06
Posted in Writing, Current Projects, Second Chances at 12:00 pm by Bryan
I wrote a sex scene last night… or more accurately, I wrote everything that led up to the sex scene and then stopped. Gabby’s looking at me like I’m crazy. I was on a tear yesterday. I wrote and wrote and wrote. I was being very productive. And Amber was ready… but I wasn’t.
I think the problem was that I skip around so much while I’m writing. This scene is later in the story, after Jason and Amber are doing things together outside the rehab facility, but I haven’t really written much where they actually get along together. In my mind, they are still in an antagonistic phase. It’s too early for them to succumb to temptation when I haven’t written any temptation between them yet.
So I stopped.
And left Amber hanging!
And left Amber hanging. I know it’s not nice, but I wasn’t ready for the scene yet. I need to write some things in the middle, then I’ll come back and let the scene come to a cli… uh, I’ll satis… we’ll wrap things up.
You’re so cruel. You’d better not do that to me in my story!
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08.03.06
Posted in Writing, Current Projects, Second Chances at 12:00 pm by Bryan
I’ll be calling T tonight.
In her last e-mail to me, she’d mentioned that she thought it might be easier to talk through the emotions she was going through rather than write them down. This woman is one complex carbohydrate… to me, it seems talking about it would be harder than writing about it. T must be an amazingly strong person. I can’t wait to meet her face to face.
Amber has got to do her justice.
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08.02.06
Posted in Writing, Method, Current Projects, Second Chances at 11:53 am by Bryan
No, not that… jeez.
We’re talking about writing here, remember?
I’ve gone back to the old way now, without the self-doubt and, amazingly, without the frustration of not knowing what’s going to happen next. But what is my writing method? How do I do it? And does anybody else do it the same way?
The first thing that happens is I see something or hear something or read something that gets my mind ticking. I think I’ve mentioned that Second Chances was actually sparked by something I’d read in a Nevada Barr mystery. One of the secondary characters in that book was confined to a wheelchair after a climbing accident.
Well my brain took a one paragraph description of the character’s recovery, threw in a little romantic tension, and came up with the idea for an entire book. The only similarity between Nevada Barr’s character and mine is the location of the injury, the third lumbar vertabrae, but as I researched spinal cord injuries, that was about the highest point in the spine that I could go which still left my character with the abilities I wanted her to have.
So my mind stews on this idea for quite a while. The general story path (my pseudo-plot that has been a source of frustration for some time) developes and as I continue to think it over specific scenes begin to evolve.
When I first start to write them down, I usually start with the scene I’ve been thinking about the most and work out the dialog. In Second Chances, after the End Of The Block, the first scene I wrote was a conversation between Jason and Dr. Martin, the director of the rehab facility where Amber is living. Amber has “fired” Jason. But Jason has a plan. He’s pruning Crepe Myrtles waiting for Amber to come to him. And Dr. Martin is wondering why Jason is pruning Crepe Myrtles rather than talking to Amber.
Well, that’s what’s happening… but I didn’t write any of that. I wrote the conversation. In over 1,000 words that I wrote longhand, there are fifteen words that are not in quotation marks. After Dr. Martin says “Look, I know Amber can be a bitch sometimes…” I have the word “ANGRY” circled above Jason’s response. At this point, there is no motion, no description, no inflection other than the words being spoken. Nobody shakes his head, or runs his fingers through his hair. Jason doesn’t even cut any branches. It’s just the dialog.
I’m still not done with the scene, but as I return to it I add all these things. I also add new dialog, thoughts, observations, etc. as I write. So these 1,000 words will be anywhere from 1,500 to 3,000 words by the time I’m done with the scene. If I’m not in the mood to write new scenes I can return to this and improve it. Otherwise, I go to the next scene in my head, which in this case takes place much later in the story and is a scene between Amber and Jason, and I write the dialog for that.
Now at some point, everything that needs to be said will have been said, and then it will be time to start pulling together the pieces and making a whole story. I’ve never actually written the words THE END before, so down the line I will have to create a process for finishing. But for now, this is what works and this is what I’m doing.
It’s how I do it.
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07.27.06
Posted in Writing, Method, Current Projects, Second Chances at 10:00 am by Bryan
I’ve been talking with a few fabulous people lately. Well, not necessarily talking, but pixelating. One of these people has volunteered to share with me her experiences in an effort to help me understand Amber from Second Chances. I had a phone conversation with her a few weeks ago, then recieved an e-mail and a voice-mail yesterday. I had another e-mail waiting for me this morning.
This woman is incredible, and the fact that she’s willing to relive that time of her life to help me with this project is just, well… stunning.
Ever since I decided to “take it seriously”, I’ve come across individuals and groups who have been so supportive, so keen on what I’m doing, that it makes dreaming about what might be seem not so silly. There is just a hint of pressure… the desire to not let them down by failing… but for the most part, it’s support, a go get ‘em attitude, and a dialog about what works and what doesn’t. And then I have people who are willing to relive and share the most painful experience of their lives on just the chance that something worthwhile will come of it.
Fabulous people. Just fabulous.
If you are reading this, you are probably one of the people I’m talking about.
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07.22.06
Posted in Writing, Photography, Acheivments, Current Projects, Second Chances at 8:00 am by Bryan
I wrote this morning. That’s two mornings in a row now.
I haven’t touched the beginning yet. So far, everything I’ve written since the End Of The Block has been strictly dialog… all these conversations that I’d ignored while trying to fix what wasn’t broke. When I say “strictly” dialog… I mean out of roughly 1,000 words, fifteen of them are not contained within quotation marks. I have to get these conversations on paper. Then there is one scene much later that will have a little more action and description that I have to write down. After that, I can come back and make sure it all works.
I haven’t decided what to do about the beginning yet. I think my frustration with it is driving the temptation to trash it entirely… but I think I can make parts of it work if I place them in present tense as it happens rather than memories. I will come back to it after the pain has subsided a little.
Working today, so probably no writing until tomorrow.
Still no check in the mail. I got the negatives sorted and waiting. Trying to be good and not hound the bride for money. The thing is, I won’t actually make a profit from this wedding until I pick up final payment in a few weeks… hopefully before I go to DC.
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07.19.06
Posted in Writing, Method, Current Projects, Second Chances at 8:00 am by Bryan
Finally.
I now know what I’m doing wrong. In simple terms, you could call it “Banging my head against the wall”, or possibly “flogging a dead horse”. Regardless, heads are being banged and there is definitely flogging going on. Whether walls or dead horses are involved, and to what extent, remains to be seen.
So, this explains what, you ask?
Writer’s Block, silly. What else could it be? Well, unless Real Life had reared it’s ugly head, or I was talking about my latest photography project, or my horse just died and I was stuck in a dead-end alley. But it wasn’t any of those other things. It was indeed writer’s block that I was refering to. Or to which I was refering. Though, actually, as I understand it now, our English teachers were lying to us all those years and there is nothing wrong with ending your sentence with a preposition. But I digress. I was talking about beating a horse with a dead wall, or something to that effect.
The problem I’m having with Second Chances is that I don’t like the way I’ve introduced my characters. It’s boring. It’s not necessarily boring to read (though that may indeed be the case) but it’s boring to write. It’s infodump. It’s explaining how the characters came to be in their particular situations. The information is key to me, to my understanding of the characters, to everything that follows.
But is it necessary for the reader?
I’m beginning to realize that everything I’ve written so far might be more appropriate for a character sheet than a novel. Is it possible that I’ve written 3,000 words and have yet to start my story? I think that’s exactly what I’ve done. I’ve been fighting the urge to skip the beginning and get to the good stuff. What if my urge was right? What if the book should begin with the good stuff and just let some of the beginning percolate through as backstory if and when it becomes important? What if fighting the urge was exactly the wrong thing to do?
Huh! Look at that. The horse must have been sleeping, because now he’s up and running again. Go figure.
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07.15.06
Posted in Writing, Photography, Method, Current Projects, Second Chances at 8:00 am by Bryan
I’m still not sure what my decision is going to be in the end, but tomorrow I’m taking only Second Chances with me to Starbuck’s. It’s at a point right now where the first two chapters have a skeleton. I wouldn’t be comfortable setting the story aside without at least fine tuning a few things in it first.
I’m going to give Amber Marie a sister. Jason already has a sister, so I’m going to introduce some of his staff as well. Then it’s a matter of filling in the backstory a little better than “and then this happened, and then that happened, and then…”
Though I haven’t received an e-mail confirming it yet, I think I will also have a meeting with the bride and groom from a couple months ago with the order for their pictures. She e-mailed me yesterday saying they were ready, so I might as well take care of that tomorrow, too.
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07.13.06
Posted in Writing, Sea of Dreams, Angel in Disguise, Current Projects, Second Chances at 8:00 am by Bryan
Well, crap.
Look at this. Look at this mess I’ve made. Because I listened to my muse (Gabby, I still love you, so please don’t leave me), I’ve been working hard on Second Chances… writing, plotting, character sheets (!?!)… even thinking about the perfect cover and the perfect model to cover the cover with. So you’d think that Second Chances is my Number One manuscript, wouldn’t you?
Well, it’s not.
Number Two?
Nope.
I have been working like hell to make my Number Three manuscript the most awesomest piece of literary accomplishment of my entire authorhoodness. Do you remember me telling you that Sea of Dreams has a self-imposed deadline of August 15th? Have you noticed lately how many times I’ve been posting about progress bars and word counts?
I’m so screwed.
I want to be a published writer (or at least an about to be published writer) by the end of the year. I’ve got to make some choices, and either move Second Chances to the top of the pile officially, or concentrate on Sea of Dreams.
Oh, and Gabby’s reminding me not to forget about Angel in Disguise or LM might get upset.
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07.10.06
Posted in Writing, Photography, Modeling, Method, Current Projects, Second Chances at 8:00 am by Bryan
I had a really pleasant photoshoot on Saturday. SS wants to do local advertising and catalog work so we had a portfolio building shoot. We’d worked together once last year, and though she has very little experience, the difference that year has made in her confidence was amazing. She’s still a little unsure of herself, often asking after she strikes a pose or tries out an expression if that was dumb or silly or unflattering. Usually she nailed it.
At one point, she asked whether “it would be okay” to pose a certain way, and a thought struck me. I already knew that she was unsure of herself, but she had good instincts. I didn’t mind giving her the positive feedback, but I knew that in a catalog shoot the pace is usually much faster and other than “good” or “great” or “a little to the left” the photographer is not going to want to spend much time building her confidence. The thing that hit me was that she could get the feedback she was looking for while asking the question in a more confident way. Rather than “would it be okay” she could ask “how about something like this”. She’d be asserting her creative energy, asking for feedback, but not sounding as if she needed reassurance.
SS did a great job.
Then, after the shoot, even though I was sore (I always have a sore back after a six hour shoot; part of the joys of being old) I called a model in Texas. One of the first things I want to do for myself next year is work on an idea for the cover of Second Chances. I don’t want to reveal too much about why T is the model I need, but after talking to her Saturday I knew she was going to be the perfect choice to represent Amber Marie.
Once I’m closer to being a real live published author, I think I’m going to steal an idea from Shannon Stacey and put up a behind the scenes section for some of my character motivations. I never really thought about it before, but Amber Marie and T will deserve it. Aside from Gabby, who will always be my muse and collaborator, I don’t think I’ve ever created a character who meant more to me than Amber Marie.
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06.29.06
Posted in Uncategorized, Writing, Photography, Modeling, Sea of Dreams, Angel in Disguise, Current Projects, Second Chances at 8:00 am by Bryan
1. Science Fiction writer/publisher Jim Baen died yesterday.
2. This weekend will be fairly busy and I’m not sure how much blogging I will get done, much less writing. Friday, I’m helping a friend set up an above-ground pool, then Saturday a trampoline. Sunday should be a Starbuck’s day if everything works out, just me and my muse.
3. I’ve got a photoshoot with a new model the following weekend. I’ve been thinking about this quite a bit the last week or so, preparing my mind for it. She’s very inexperienced and unsure exactly what types of work she wants to get, so it is probably going to be a shoot where we talk almost as much as we actually shoot. There are so many things she needs to learn about the business, what to expect, what sorts of conduct to expect from photographers and art directors, etc. I like these shoots more than I’m letting on here. They’re actually quite relaxing because there are no time pressures and no set agenda. I’ve made some wardrobe recommendations, and I have a few things for her to try out, but nothing is written in stone. I have no idea what we will actually be doing. Fun.
4. I received an email from a model I worked with in DC about 6 years ago. She wants to shoot again when I am there at the end of August. I was planning to sneak away from family for a couple day trips here and there to do some architectural photography anyway, so we will probably try to slip in some casual and lifestyle shots on one of those days… if it ever stops raining, that is.
5. I actually found myself doing research again for Second Chances. I needed an accurate feel as to recovery periods and medical prognosis after particular injuries. It’s already been emotionally investing. I barely have any character developement done at all, and it still hurts to feel what Amber Marie has gone through. This is the story that that Gabby is responsible for.
6. I think Gabby Carruthers will be my nom de plum for those stories that I think might benefit by being written by a woman (or at least be a harder sell if written by a man). For this reason, Angel in Disguise will probably also be credited to Gabby. The other stories will remain mine for the time being, especially Sea of Dreams since Gabby is in that one.
7. Martina Hingis won her second round match at Wimbledon yesterday. She’s currently ranked at #15 in the world after starting her comeback this year. As of January 7th she was unranked, so she’s been doing well.
8. I’m not sure what’s going on with Team USA in soccer. They were ranked #5 in the world by FIFA but they can’t get out of the first round? I think we’ve been second class for so long that the team gets nervous as they step onto the pitch in the World Cup. It’s the only explanation I can think of, because we’re better than we showed in Germany this year. Oh, well. We get to try again in four more years.
9. I’m listening to Lisa Gerrard right now. Mellow.
10. Believe it or not, vanilla really is my favorite flavor.
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06.23.06
Posted in Writing, Acheivments, Sea of Dreams, Angel in Disguise, Current Projects, Second Chances at 10:00 am by Bryan
I’ve caught up on all my typing.
For the next several days, I’ll be going into serious polish mode on Angel in Disguise and Second Chances. Once that is done and the edits keyed, I will be returning to Sea of Dreams to hit that hard and heavy. I am way behind schedule for August 15th, so I need to try to make some progress.
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06.22.06
Posted in Writing, Acheivments, Sea of Dreams, The Dragon's Dream, Angel in Disguise, Current Projects, Second Chances at 12:00 pm by Bryan
I was distracted yesterday and forgot what day it was, so I’ll do the counts today. Besides, I’m not sure what I want to post today.
Sea of Dreams - planning only; no new words
Angel in Disguise - fairly raw; needs polish
Second Chances - very raw; needs lot’s of polish
The Dragon’s Dream - needs lots of research; on hold
Like I said before… trudging
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06.20.06
Posted in Writing, Second Chances at 8:00 am by Bryan
I hate the Writing without Polishing Method. Sure you get the ideas down and fly through the story, but it’s bland, it’s depressing. I don’t think I can keep doing it. I’ve got the first two chapters of Second Chances done, but by the word count, it’s barely worthy of one chapter. And I hate reading it. The plot elements are there, but there’s no polish. Where’s the Pledge? I got some polishing to do.
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