Archive for March, 2007
So, I was taking OH, our resident COLLEGE STUDENT, to task over a small grammatical error in an e-mail. And she responded by poking fun at me (in fairness, I was poking fun at myself while correcting her). I started to send along another snarky reply, but thought the greater CB community might have fun with this too. So here you go for your fifth Friday enjoyment:
Okay, here’s where I admit I read “Eats Shoots and Leaves” as a call to arms. Yes, I have become one of them: a Grammar Guerrilla.
In fact, I was attending a weekly cooking class at a local high school last year, and found my tender sensibilities horribly assaulted by this sign on the pop machines:
Do Not Use During the Hours of 8 am and 4 pm.
Obviously, based on the hullabaloo at the time regarding children’s sugar intake, the intent of this piece of signage was to prohibit teenagers from polluting their bodies with school-sponsored sucrose or high-fructose corn syrup during classroom hours. However, the sign actually seems to imply that the school is, in fact, only concerned with students as they trudge in (during the 8:00 a.m. hour) and as they race out (the 4:00 p.m. hour).
I looked up the e-mail address for the principal of the high school and sent her an e-mail. I pointed out that the intent and actual letters of the sign did not mesh. I deplored the sorry state of education today. And alluded to my great astonishment that hordes of ravening English teachers had not descended on that sign with red pens in hand.
Two weeks later, I was very pleased to note that the sign had been replaced. Score one for the English language!
[Now, if only Albertson’s were so easy. For some reason, they insist on using “Albertsons” on all their corporate communications, as if the store were the home of a family of Albertsons as opposed to having once, in a gentler age, been owned by an Albertson (Albertson’s) or a few Albertsons (Albertson’s).]
I believe it is only by challenging these attacks on the English language -where ever they may lurk - that we honor our ancestors. Those brave folk strode forward out of the primordial ooze with only the primative communication methods of grunts, chest beating, and stick figures scratched in rock. It is only through power of evolution that we have emerged over thousands of years to the ability to communicate complex thoughts through 26 simple symbols (plus a few parentheses or two).
I freely admit that I am Don Quixote, tilting at windmills once again. What is your hopeless cause?
(PS to West Coast-ers, if you want a Bob left-coast writers’ retreat, see ZaZa’s post below…)
March 30th, 2007
Since this is the fifth Thursday (at least according to my laptop’s calendar, without which I am clueless) of the month, I guess I’m not running over anyone else’s time.
Two things:
A Bob Mayer writing retreat on the Left Coast. I’ve talked to Bob, and he’s willing to do one out here. OH and I will be handling the arrangements. He’s left it fairly open for dates, so we need to get some idea of a timeframe for the planning. I’ve created a new blog just for the Retreat planning and discussion: http://zazzy.wordpress.com/
Please go take a look. The first post is a general run down on the event and planning options.
Also, uh…I’ve forgotten the second thing. Pitiful. Just pitiful. Oh! The CafePress stuff. I’m going to try to get to that this weekend. I’m really swamped at the moment, but I hope to have everything under control by then. Heee!
Oh, and BCB, the logo will probably have to wait for the web site. Not really any place to put it on the blog, except greatly reduced. Wait! I have an idea! We’ll see if it pans out.
March 29th, 2007
OK, clearly it didn’t work. So -
Berry Lemon Bars
Serves 8 as a tart, makes 16 2” bars
Based on “Lemon Crumb Tart” from Elinor Klivan’s Bake and Freeze Desserts
Crumb Crust
1 ¼ C cake flour
1/3 C powdered sugar
10 T cold butter, cut up
Crumb Topping
1/3 C unbleached flour
1/3 C brown sugar
4 T cold butter, cut up
1 ½ C fresh or frozen unsweetened raspberries or blueberries
Lemon Filling
1 ½ C sugar
4 large eggs
¼ C fresh lemon juice
1 t baking powder
¼ C unbleached flour
2 t grated lemon zest
powdered sugar for dusting
Preheat the oven to 350º F. Butter an 8” square pan or a 9” springform pan.
Crust: Mix flour, powdered sugar and butter, ‘til pea-sized crumbs form. Press into the bottom and 1” up the sides of the pan. Bake 15 minutes. The crust will shrink slightly, but is only partially baked. Set aside.
Crumb Topping: Without washing the bowl, add the 3 topping ingredients, and mix ‘til large bean-sized crumbs form. Set aside.
Filling: Put sugar, eggs and lemon juice into a large mixing bowl. Mix ‘til just smooth. Sift the baking powder and flour together, then, with the lemon zest, stir into the egg mixture, just ‘til smooth.
Pour the lemon mixture over the crust – it should not be allowed to over top the edge. Gently berries on the lemon mixture before putting it into the oven. Bake 25 minutes. Scatter topping over the filling and bake 25 minutes or more, ‘til the middle is set when gently shaken. Adding frozen berries slows baking time. If omitting berries, or your oven runs hot, reduce each baking time by 5 minutes.
Let cool thoroughly before attempting to remove from pan – draw a knife around the edge to loosen. Sprinkle with powdered sugar after cooled.
March 29th, 2007
So, I don’t anticipate doing much in terms of actual posting, but ZaZa gave me author permissions to put the lemon bar recipe up.
I’m uploading a Word document, because I usually cut and paste to Word before printing. We’ll see if it works. If it doesn’t, or if you’d prefer text in the post, let me know!
March 29th, 2007
Hi everybody.
I’ve had a few e-mails telling me to get my butt outta the closet and come out and play, so, here I am, playing. Life is in a weird place for me right now. I’m on the verge. On the verge of good stuff, mind you, but it’s a verge none the less, and verges are weird places. I’ve been shut down and in a waiting mode for so long (and going deeper and deeper into hiberanation as the verge gets closer) that I’m not sure how I’ll react when it’s spring again.
But things are happening and the difference between March and April will be as drastic as a winter night and a fresh spring morning.
The first piece of my new life fell into place a week ago today. I found out that Amy Leigh has been accepted into The Kinsey Institute’s 2007 Juried Erotic Art Show (link warning: image is an artistic nude). The show is from April 13th through July 20th at the Kinsey Institute’s Gallery in Bloomington, Indiana (Morrison Hall on the campus of Indiana University). Opening night will be a new experience for me as I’ve never really felt a part of the art world. I was an accounting major in school and the last art class I had was probably finger painting in the second grade. (not exactly true, but in my high school photography class it was more about the physics and chemistry rather than studio lighting, makeup, wardrobe, and posing). I’m self-taught for the most part and know very little about real art. In fact, much of what passes for art these days I don’t even like. I remember seeing a work at The Art Institute of Chicago that was a ten foot square canvas painted white with a small red dot in the middle of it. I remember remarking at the time that if I could do it, it wasn’t art. I may have to rethink that criteria now.
One odd reaction to this first piece of news is that I now have four models who want to be next. This year will apparently have no lack of “fun” projects in preparation for the 2008 show.
So anyway… that’s the first piece of the new puzzle that is my life. Other things are coming. Before long, my life is going to be completely different. And it’s about damn time, too. I’m tired of waiting mode.
March 26th, 2007
First- It’s still Wednesday in my time zone.
Second- I a’int got nuthin’ ‘ceptin sum rambles, so here goes…
I love instant messenger- I use Yahoo!- I love that I can talk to my mom at strange hours or leave her quick messages when I think of something. My Hunny and I also use it to play dominos while we talk to each other on the phone.
I’m confused about Spring- a few weeks ago we had snow on the ground and now it’s in the 70s and sunny and people are telling me it’s too late to plant a garden. Garden!?! Plant!?! I just want to be able to take a roto teller to the yard with the goal of having some grass by the end of the summer.
Rocks- they absorb the heat and throw it back on the house which makes it very much hotter. If I were a civilised person this would mean I would have to run the air conditioner more, but since I don’t have A/C, it just means it’s hot. Since our water prices went up around here more and more people are rocking their yards and I don’t get it. The money you’re saving on water you’re spending on electricity. This doesn’t sound like a good thing to me.
Margaritas- love them- make great ones- need to have folks over for margaritas and grilled something soon. Y’all want to come?
Bathroom- it’s still not finished- the faucet got waylaid somewhere between Houston and NE Colorado- but it’s been found and it is waiting to be put in. I can’t wait to have a bathroom sink. My Hunny keeps looking at the cabinet and trying to figure out a way to make it two inches shorter since I have a sink that rests on top and I am short. I think it would be a good idea, but I’m not sure how it’s going to happen.
Sisters- I’ve got a great one- she lets me show up every year or so and crash at her world while I go gawk at museums because I’m a geek- now if I could just convince her that the world won’t come crashing in if she visits Colorado life would be good.
Downloadable audio books- hooray- love that I can download audio books from the Denver Public Library and listen to them while I do housework or whatever. Some of them can even be legally burned to cd so I can listen to them while doing yardwork.
Cookie Sales- are over this weekend- our troop is missing cookies- that isn’t good- but it’s over this weekend. That is good- I’m so happy!!!!
Shovels- I received three of them for Christmas, so if anybody needs to borrow one, let me know.
Proofreading- something I should do but I’m too tired. I’m going to bed- talk to y’all tomorrow.
March 21st, 2007
Hi all!
Thanks so much for the support, it is so nice and a bit of a surprise. I honestly had no idea that BCB would do such a sweet and nice thing for someone else. Snort. Okay, so she does a lot of nice things, but for me? Geez, damn near gave me a heart attack. But seriously, when I sent her and a few other writers the link it wasn’t to have them post, but just to share an OMG! Am I really an author? Yes, I am. It’s really happening. Still in a bit of shock here and since I’m in good company I don’t mind telling you that I have pre-ordered a few books myself. When the rest of the CB writers get published I will be first in line. I also don’t mind admitting I go to those sites on a daily basis, just to look. It’s a weird feeling to see your name on a book cover. I so can’t wait to get that book in my hands.
I know I’ve been a bit absent these days and I wish I could say it was because I was so busy with good stuff, but that isn’t the case. However, I refuse to let all the crap get me down. I just needed a bit of time to absorb all that was going on with me and give me and my family a chance to deal with it. Now things are starting to look up. Well as up as they can be with two teenagers under foot and one 9 year old that thinks he’s freaking Wayne Gretzky. Oh, and lets not forget the fourth child I didn’t realize I had until last night at the dinner table, geez.
Anyway, I debated long and hard if I should give you all an excerpt or not. I kept telling myself, you didn’t really care. Okay, so you care but what I mean is that, this isn’t about me. Really, I get that. It’s about a world that got created out of total whackyness. A group of peope who gathered together for one purpose, but no one actually knew the purpose - or did you and you just didn’t fill me in. Whatever. But I’ve decided to share a short excerpt. It’s unedited so the final product may vary slightly since I haven’t done my final edits yet. I should get them soon.
The excerpt comes about halfway through the book and I just thought you all would like it. It’s very short. And if you never want to see an excerpt again, just let me know and then on my next post I’ll pick on you. If you hate it, I don’t need to know, lie and tell me you love it, but buy the book anyway. If you love it, feel free to send general praise my way.
Enjoy - JenT
“Take a deep breath,” Jared whispered in her ear.
She swallowed and peered around the corner. Her heart pulsed, then stopped for a brief moment, before it began to flutter in inconsistent beats. Both of her hands instinctively clamped down over her gaping mouth, muffling her scream.
Blood was smeared across what remained of her bed. The mattress had been pulled to the side, half sitting on the floor with the insides exposed by each tear. Four men, all with gloves and masks on stopped what they were doing and stared at her, before going back to taking samples and pictures.
“Where did the blood…” she gagged, “blood come from?” The muscle on Jared’s bicep didn’t even flinch when she grabbed it for support.
“We don’t think it’s human,” someone said.
“Little Jimmy Henderson said his dog didn’t come home last night.” Jared looped his arms around her, but it didn’t stop her body from trembling. “But we don’t know anything right now.”
Turning her head, the bright red writing on the wall caught her attention. The letters where dripping down like the title in the book Helter Skelter. “Oh, God.” She stared at the words ‘Die Bitch’. The empty contents of her stomach lurched up. “I’m going to be sick.”
A thud, followed by a few curses fell faint in her ears as she pushed everyone and anything aside that stood in her path. The bathroom seemed so far away. Not bothering to shut the door, she dropped to her knees and gagged. Then gagged again. But the only thing that came up was a foul taste.
Her entire body broke out in a cold sweet. Shaking her hands out, she stood up, panic gripping her good judgment. Her pulse hurt as it pounded loudly in her head. She paced in the tiny bathroom unaware of her surroundings. Unable to cope. “Damn it!” She swiped her hand across the sink, knocking everything to the floor. “I won’t be afraid!”
“You have to be afraid.” Jared’s voice rang out strong and confident. He yanked her by the shoulders and heaved her to his chest with steady arms. “This guy, whoever he is, has snapped. We need to believe he’ll stop at nothing–”
“To kill me?” She pounded on Jared’s chest. “Why me? What the hell did I ever do?”
March 19th, 2007
I am so excited to be able to say this: Jennifer Talty’s e-books are now available to pre-order in PRINT form! At both Books-A-Million and at Borders — even at Borders in Canada, but I don’t know the link for that.
I am so happy for her and so proud but I know she’ll never come over here to tell everyone because she’s kind of shy. You know how Jen can be. But there is nothing stopping me, is there? As I understand it — and I could be wrong, but I’m not — in the world of e-books pre-orders are everything. Extremely important. So go order a copy or two. I did. Go now. Yes, you over in the corner. Go.
Here’s the link to Books-A-Million, where you can order RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU
Books-A-Million
And to Borders, where you can order RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU and her anthology HAUNT ME BABY, ONE MORE TIME
Borders
HA! I think I maybe even did that right without breaking anything. If not, Bryan will fix it. Right, Bryan?
I’m going to go hide out now, because she is going to just kill me for doing this. I don’t even have to answer my phone because I know what she’ll say: “I can’t believe you did that!” Yeah, funny thing, people are saying that to me a lot these days. But what are friends for? Someday she’ll do it for me.
It is just so exciting to see someone’s dreams coming true.
March 17th, 2007
I’ve never been one to go ga-ga over a pair of shoes (sorry MCB) I never saw the appeal. They were just something that covered my feet, kept them warm, dry and comfortable. I liked them to look nice but that was it.
Purses, on the other hand, I change those suckers every couple of months. They all have to be able to fit a wallet, notebook and paperback inside them. In recent years, a side pocket for my cell phone has become desirable but book space is a necessity. I like them in various shapes and sizes, textures and colours. I spend entirely too much time checking out purses when I’m out shopping. I saw the most gorgeous red handbag at Payless the other day…
Several months ago, Scope and I watched an English film called Kinky Boots. It’s the story of a shoe factory in Northern England that was saved from bankruptcy by switching it’s production from men’s shoes to boots and heels for transvestites. Not only was the film hilarious,and at times poignant, it filled me full of facts about the way heels were originally designed for men in the French court, how they strengthen calf muscles and lift buttocks to present them in desirable poses.
It seemed like hogwash until I bought a pair of winter boots that had a bit of a heel. I’m used to wearing them through elephant season, digging down to get traction as I punch my way through crusted snow. Once that elephants departed, and I was walking on level ground I could feel the difference a heel made. My stride is different, my gait more dependent on the sway of my hips than seems necessary. I also hear strutting music when I walk but that could just be me.
If I can find a pair of shoes to match that purse, I’ll be in heaven.
What about you? Heels or sneakers? Cowboy boots or hiking boots? Does it matter?
March 14th, 2007
I know I’m posting right on the heels of McB, but since this is an “On Topic Only” post….
Right now this is what my sister and I are thinking for the meet in DC
Sunday April 1 (that part isn’t too negotiable)
2:00pm
Crystal City- we thought this was a good choice because it has a variety of eating establishments- isn’t too difficult for drivers to get to- has plenty of parking- is easy for those using the metro to get to- and honestly, I like it
http://www.commuterpage.com/ART/villages/crystalcity_cal.htm is a link to crystal city
Does anyone have a preference there? Or someplace else?
March 14- edited to correct the date- you know the one I thought I knew before I posted- the one that I’m brain dead about- yep- that date-
March 11th, 2007
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