Changes in Attitudes, Changes in Latitudes

That’s a line from a very old song.  I can’t quite remember the whole thing, but that part stuck with me because I do believe that attitude is a big part of getting through this life; it’s also the only thing that you really have a choice over.  What got me thinking about it just now is Jenny’s posts over at Argh Ink. about cleaning her office. 

I’ve got stuff that, similar to Jenny’s office, needs doing.  Rooms that have gone unattended way too long and ideas for spaces if I ever get them cleaned out.  I am not, however, a terribly ambitious nor obsessive person so I find it all to easy to over look a lot of things.  And you know what happens when you do that, right?  Those gremlins come in when you aren’t looking and make the whole thing so much worse. 

A lot of my trouble is a tendency to think “I’ll put that away in a minute” or “I’m going to do something with that when I have the time.”  So things don’t get put away right away and they start piling up.  I could kick myself when this happens because I know how my mind works.  If it’s tidy and clean I have no problem with housework.  But when it piles up and gets dusty I avert my eyes and promise to tackle it … eventually.  Clearly I need to have some sort of system in place here, and I’ve known it for a while.  And this is where the attitude thing comes in.

I’m not a lazy person,  I know this stuff needs doing but there’s just a lot of other stuff I’d really prefer to do.  Spend time with friends, read, crochet, garden, nap … not necessarily in that order.  My “me” time is very important to me.  It’s not as though I’m negelecting everything.  My bills are paid and laundry is done and we have clean dishes.  Mentally I have assigned these things to a higher priority.  They are my “must do’s” as opposed to my “need to do’s” and “should do’s.”  MD’s have to get done because there are consequences if they aren’t.  NTD’s are things like cleaning the bathrooms and cutting the grass.  I consider them essential but the consequences aren’t as immediate.  And then there are the SD’s.

SD’s are things like culling paperwork, dusting, decluttering the closet and so on.  I know that if they are done my life will be more pleasant.  I’ll enjoy my environment more and be motivated to maintain them.  I’ll also be able to have guests visit.  But let’s face it, dusting can always be put off another day.  And a little clutter never hurt anyone.  Well not seriously anyway.  But that attitude has a tendency to backfire on me because I actually do care how things look and I’m much happier when things are well organized.  So it’s time for an attitude shift.  It’s time to make this stuff a priority at least for now.

In order to change your attitude, however, you have to know yourself really well.  You have to be willing to face your faults and weaknesses and see them for what they are.  In my case it’s knowing that I find it too easy to put things off and am daunted by jobs that are too big.  Some people find it energizing; I am not one of them.  Once you face your foibles, you have motivate yourself to change.  It’s not enough to say “I’m going to be different.”  If it were that easy then change wouldn’t be necessary, right?  I use the word motivate but in all honesty it’s more like manipulating.  Yes, I manipulate myself.  I play mind games to nudge my thinking around the way I want to be.  Why not?  We do it with other people, right?  Your spouse or your kid or your boss … you figure out how to get around them in order to get what you want, right?  So why not use that same methodology on yourself?  Who better if you think about it, since you know you better than anyone, if you’ve been honest with yourself.  Okay, that’s an awkward sentence but you see where I’m going, right? 

This works for many things and trust me is worth trying.  I’ve manipulated myself into losing weight, learning something new, dealing better with people … and now I’m putting it into practice to get my life sort out.

I’m going to focus on one element at a time.  This system has two benefits:  (1) it gives you smaller, more manageable tasks that are less overwhelming, and (2) as you check off each chore you get a feeling of accomplishment that helps sustain you through the next task.  I have to do it this way because otherwise I see the job as just too big.  Attitude again.  I actually started last night but taking a garbage bag into one room and going around grabbing things to be thrown away.  And I used the smallish kitchen can liners for the job rather than the bigger rubbish bags because filling a bag and carrying it out again make me feel like I’ve accomplished something … hey I got rid of a whole bag of stuff!  It’s like the joke about being able to eat an entire cow - one bite at a time.  If I focus on doing just one thing at time and keep going I’ll eventually get to the end.

If you need a jumping off point, the topic is times and ways you’ve decided to make changes for the better. 

121 comments September 10th, 2007